once upon a time there was a marketing manager, he lived in... Oh! fuck it!!! apne ishtyle... ek potta tha jisko markeding ka bahut keedaa tha....OOps!!! IINGLISSS!!!
A geek that's what he thinks of himself but in real arrogant, neat freak, smart ASS, who could just do the right things that one can expect from a marketing guy. typical beer mera biryani tera types....
One day he got a jackpot, a job in marketing!! Dude is happy and his doodle hard!!! fantasizing all the possible strategies he should play internally and externally.
First day of his office...
Introduced himself to his peers and got placed at the only left out work station. Who knew that was the most cussed chair to rest your derriere. His asst. comes to him, 'hey so u want me to call u boss or sir, i am comfortable calling you dude!...' this dude is traumatized. Meanwhile, an ugly looking geek comes and starts with an assertive voice in greek and latin about all the IT support he can ask when for required at point any time come room to solution ask..WTF sorry i started talking like Mr. Broker. This IT guy is not comfortable with any language other than his panzy body language. So anyways final our dude got a notebook with a dongle...aamm... along with a dongle to surf. Mr. Broker, 'You naughty do watch porn not in office, cooommmeeee to maayye kyabin'. Oh god NO!! our protagonist is straight.
Enemies are everywhere and this guy found his... lucky bastard! Anyways that's the worn out antique dell laptop(I guess charles babbage time's) with 256mb ram, 40gb hard disc, hey this machine has unique features as well, one of its keys can actually jump....u see this is so useful while your comp is loading, u can actually pastime playing with it. Our philip kotler of the story could hardly realize how big his enemy was... first presentation to the CEO, ppt packed with all the possible strategies with all the innovative revenue models to impress the DOG oops! GOD the CEO, Mr. Pillai. who can be impressed with a tender coconut and a fried machli, awww... so dude in the conference room trying to impress the CEO and the first embarrassment - hero presses the enter key and the shift key jumps up...aa aoo.. its not playtime:( our dear hero apologizing everyone starts with his presentation, the slide gets stuck at the very beginning 'MKTG - Way Forward' and that slide never moved forward. Poor guy!!! from his asst. 'I told you dont use your machine it hardly works, you didn't listen to me! Now see' Asshole is very happy for the screw up and he treated Broker in a gay pub.
Hero throwing tantrums all around enters the IT room, Ovv! ;) tell me what I can do for you?'... "I will break your balls, where's my new laptop?" you know who said this. ‘Yaar I talked to the delly team for the belly oh sorry dell lapy coming week before after they send’ Poor guy too frustrated in life could do nothing than hitting Mr. broker on his shoulder ‘Ouch’
Finally he gets his brand new laptop. ‘take you virgin laptop and say thank you to me’ says Mr. pansy. Dude thought ‘yes I got my new machine now no one can stop me from working! Oh god! I have so much to work…’
Its all fine for the first week and then…
Broker!!! Broker!!! You fucker what the fuck is wrong with you guys whenever I touch it, it turns off! WTFFFF!!!! . ‘Oh! You touch and it turns off OMG how orgasmic are u…!’ Mr. pansy in his style. Dude fix it today or I will give you multiple orgasms in life’ Mr. Marketer. Broker comes back saying everything is fixed. Dude reaches home start working as he has lot of pending work. Seeing this, his dear wife brings him a coffee, taking the coffee in one hand and he takes the laptop in other to realize windows is shutting down…
15 days of work is stuck shuffling between standby Dell >HP> Compaq>, had to depend on his jack ass asst. for everything. Dude is disgusted and work deprived by now. ‘Here is your laaapy I fix everywhere you see not stop atall’ says Mr. Broker putting the machine on the desk. Dude touches the machine to test and the machine turns offfff!!!
All the techies behind it and non could solve. Dude had to take the machine back from them do his own R & D on comps…
Finally a solution…. The machine turns off only when the charger is connected so dude had to use the machine only once charger is removed.
Eureekaaaa!!!!!! Dude ran to the IT room and discussed the whole research… ignoring that Mr. Pillai was in the IT Room.
And our protagonist was promoted as the Head of the dept. IT, since then he is called “THE JAFFA”
